happy melancholy               

quoted from a forum, but i edited the story a little to add some extra elements:



A student asks a teacher, "What is Love?" The teacher said, "In order to answer your question, go to the corn field, choose the biggest corn and come back. But the rule is: You can go through them only once and not turn back to pick." (Once you miss it, you cannot go back to it)


The student headed for the field, and went through the first row. He saw one big corn, but he wondered.. may be there is a bigger one later. Then he saw another bigger one.. but wondered if there may be an even bigger one waiting for him.


Afterwards, when he had completed more than half of the corn field, he started to realize that the corn growing around the area were not as big as the previous one he saw. He knew he missed the biggest one, and he regretted it. So, he went back to his teacher empty handed.


The teacher told him, "This is Love.. you keep looking for a better one, but you only realize it when you have already missed the person.."

"What is Marriage then?" the student asked.

The teacher said, "In order to answer your question, go back to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back. But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick."


The student went back to the corn field, and this time he was careful not to repeat the previous mistake. When he reached the middle of the field, he picked a corn that he felt satisfied with, and came back to the teacher.


The teacher told him, "When picking the corn this time.. you looked for one that is just nice, that you had faith in and are satisfied with.... this is Marriage."



so how many of us actually manage to pick the satisfactory corn that happened to be the biggest at the same time?


and you wonder too, if the boy was still thinking of the biggest corn that he first saw when he came back with the second corn to his teacher.

i am tired. but at the same time, i am also empowered.
and upon this empowerment, i draw more strength to combat the tireness.

and as i get more tired, i get more empowered.
hence, the strength that i draw becomes greater each time.

this cycle takes place everyday, as i continue trudging through the urban forest.

temporial reliefs taking form in the shape of saturdays and sundays..

i may be tied up, i may be busy, but i never allow myself to lose sight of my objective.

there's seriously something i don't understand nowadays.

firstly, there's the one big hoo ha about dawn yeo. if you don't know who she is
(where've you been?!!?!), you can view her blog here.
this girl has looks, became a very popular net babe, even got featured on fhm
singapore. but fame is a double edged sword. there were accusations of plastic
surgery, breast augmentation, etc, which she denied to it all in the new paper.

what's the big deal about her having plastic surgery? is it so news worthy to even
interview her in the new paper? right, maybe i'm just not one of those kay poh ones..

secondly, after her denial, apparently someone had some problems with her
non-admittance, and promptly made a lengthy blog post complete with supposed
evidence to disprove it. you can view the piece of work here.

actually spending all that time to make such a post? complete with pictures to prove
his/her point? what do you gain from this man.. seriously.

next thing i know, we're gonna see an article on whether steven lim was actually
a woman, complete with investigations and interviews from thailand sex change hospitals.
and in the straits times, front page, headlines. now that'd be cool.

the final step into a dysfunctional society.

i was bored at work today. so i went surfing. (shh)
and i didn't know what to surf. so i started from my own blog. clicked on a link.
then another link. and another link. and another link. you get the idea.

i came across a few blogs that were interesting. student's sketchpad was one.
i'm actually posting up their link here because they asked the readers to, if we found their
entries interesting. some content on stereotyped school students. it was amusing to me.
i was an ri boy. not proud of it. could identify with some parts, especially the parts with the
scgs/rgs girls and acs boys, gep students and elitist mindsets. i hated all that shit. but i digress..

was surprised to learn that the artists and writers were really just secondary school students.
such talent! if it were during my generation, those sketches would have just been confined to
torn and dog-eared note books. the internet - what a great place for expressions.

came across a few more blogs. was again surprised by the writing style, thoughts and maturity
level of some of those bloggers. 12 years old, and writing like a young adult, knowing how to
express their views, and actually blogging. i don't know what to say. the me of 12 years ago, was
only interested in playing street fighter and soccer.

i had my suspicions from observing kids nowadays, that they were growing up at a much faster
pace than my generation had. and from reading these blogs, it only confirmed my suspicions
further. questions raced through my head.. what was causing this change? kiasu parents?
result-oriented schools? and then it hit me.. it was the very thing i was staring at. the internet.
mass amounts of knowledge gained through reading the free flow of information, and losing
their innocence without them knowing at the same time.

i find it sad. i had a childhood, and i'm grateful to my parents for providing me with one.
maybe its sentimentality, but i have fond memories of days when i was a child without worries.

i wonder what it'll be like for the next generation after this.. i'm feeling old already.

some random thoughts that i had during these few days. time to ponder.

1. if a miss singapore contestant, or any beauty contestant, has had plastic surgery done before, is it counted as cheating?

2. great points about working in chinatown: ease of connectivity to people, food glorious food.

3. anyone notice how eerily pan mei chen's eyes look like jay chou's? (maybe she's his natural mom)

4. people will always take the route with lesser resistance, just cause its the easier way out, but not because its really the better route to take.

5. what would you do without your mobile phone, and the internet? i'd be really lost.. this is how dependent we have all become on these 2 mediums.

6. saddening to learn about the recent suicide cases. suicide is really not the way out.. its escapism. your life is not your own. it belongs to all the people who love and care for you. even if you believe there are none, there will be. and its worth taking the time to find that person for yourself.

7. love transends all boundaries. i'm looking forward to meet a good old dear friend of mine who's canadian and flying over the end of this month. a mutual friend of ours, who happens to be her boyfriend, is flying her down to this tiny little island to spend time together. its not easy, its a bold step. and for having the guts to do all that, i respect. wishing the both of you the best.

tequila neat. salt and a slice of lemon.
not very tasteful. bitter, salty, sour..
and then a burning sensation down your throat to remind yourself that you're alive.

my choice of poison. what's yours?